Late Night Recaps Democrats’ Troubled Election Results

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“I mentioned that they held this QAnon event in Dallas last night. Hundreds of illiterates gathered because they believed JFK Jr. and JFK Sr. would resurface and bring Donald Trump back to power, because frankly the Kennedys would be huge Trump fans. ” – JIMMY WHO

“Of course, JFK Jr. died tragically 22 years ago, so any announcement from him at this point would be pretty big.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Now, some of these people believe that JFK Jr. will be taking office soon, based on T-shirts suggesting that JFK Jr. will become former vice president of JFK Jr. in 2024. It makes sense: Kennedy died more than 20 years ago, but he’s still more realistic than Mike Pence.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Surprisingly, JFK Jr. He didn’t show up in Dallas yesterday afternoon because of his chronic ‘not alive’ case.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“But the QAnon crowd did not lose hope, as rumors began to circulate that JFK Jr. would appear at a concert by the Rolling Stones that evening. Guys, come on. You can’t always get what you want. But sometimes if you try, you may find that you get just what you need. Which is medicine? — STEPHEN COLBERT

“So, the concert took place and JFK Jr. wasn’t a show. Some QAnon believers walked away with a new theory about his father: Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards, actually President John F. Kennedy. Okay, that’s crazy. President Kennedy would have been 104 years old and Keith Richards much older than that.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Who should be more insulted – Keith Richards by people who think he’s a 104-year-old JFK, or JFK for those who think he’s a 77-year-old Keith Richards. I do not know.” – JIMMY WHO

“It’s crazy that people really believe that. I mean, if you’re going to believe a group of dead Kennedys in disguise, wouldn’t you assume it was the Dead Kennedys?” – JIMMY WHO

Samantha Bee explored the latest developments in the Supreme Court’s abortion rights cases during Wednesday’s “Full Frontal.”

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