The 40-Hour Work Week Is Actually Life



I am a staff member in a predominantly white institution. Last week, my colleague asked me to welcome a new employee to our university, even though we are working remotely and working with this new person’s team. This employee is a person of color and my colleague who asked me for help is a white woman. In the email, my colleague apologized for “choosing my identity”. Still, he thought I would be a great person to welcome the employee to the team and “spill the tea” about our university. He said maybe I could suggest a church or a place to get a haircut. A close colleague told me I should applaud. Sorry for not talking about the subject. I am not a belligerent person and I assumed this colleague was operating in good faith despite questionable language. I wonder how you will react and what you will say to the color worker. I plan to reach out to this employee and share my mixed honest experience.

– Anonymous, Kansas

Many of us who work in predominantly white institutions have been forced into this Minority Ambassador position and navigated these senseless microaggressions. It’s tokenizing at best, but I’m assuming your colleague like you operates in a manner similar to goodwill. I don’t know what I would do if I were you. We cannot always applaud; It depends on the power dynamics. Now that I’m on staff, I’d write a quick response, “You really choose my identity,” with a quick response that clarifies where the person went wrong.

Before that, I would probably say nothing and take my frustrations to the group chat. Regardless, I would reach out to the new employee on my own to introduce myself and be a colleague and offer any help they might need to join a new community. At every institution I attend, I am incredibly grateful to the Black staff and faculty who greeted me, arranged the grounds, and yes, let me know where I could get my hair done. Wherever I am, I try to do the same for others who join the community I am a part of.

I got a new job just before the pandemic and my boss is a dingus. He’s a good enough guy and a good but messy and poor communicator in the high-end parts of his job. This makes a job I love otherwise very challenging in silly ways. We are planning to return to the office soon and next to her I have no idea how to control my facial expressions. I’m used to rolling my eyes and cursing her out loud while working from home. Any tips on how to recreate this “job filter”?

— anonymous

This situation requires maturity. We all work with incompetent, exasperating or otherwise intolerable people. But we cannot express our displeasure towards them. This is rude and can really jeopardize your career. Which is more important: rolling your eyes or getting your paycheck? Every time your boss does something stupid, ask yourself this question and grit your teeth accordingly. That said, maybe you’re asking the wrong question. Would it be possible for you to approach your boss kindly on these organizational and communication issues? If he’s good and good at some of his work, he may be open to constructive, thoughtful feedback. I don’t think this is an all or nothing situation.

My company requires employees to return to the office after Labor Day. Three days a week at the office, two days at home. Normally I would accept this but I have a child too young to be vaccinated. With cases rising again, I’ll probably pick him up from kindergarten until he’s available for a vaccine. In the meantime, I’ll have to homeschool him. And that seems incompatible with working in an office. My wife also works full time and childcare is a burden we will share until our child is vaccinated. Do you have any advice on how I should approach this issue with my employer?

— Anonymous, Austin

Many parents face this untenable situation. I’m sorry you have to make these impossible decisions. Ask your employer if you can work from home until the child is vaccinated. Explain your reasoning as it is perfectly reasonable. If that’s not possible, can you and your partner swap days at home and at the office? Given the way things are going with the Delta variant, I think your employer might change their plans to return to the office.



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